three nights left. three nights left of sleeping in my amazing bed with my lovely comforter. three nights left of sleeping in a bed. and then . . . couches. forever.
i hope not forever. just for a bit.
things are starting to calm down. the party went well. actually, it was great. a lot of people came, and it was great to introduce most to my infatuation with new zed. and it wasn't just my parents friends, some of mine came.
also, they were EXTREMELY generous. basically, i have more than enough cash.
all the big things are finished. just tying up loose ends. packing and such.
i haven't got emotional yet. my friend jill left today. she comes and visits a few times a month. my parents were really upset to see her leave. when i came home from dropping her off at the train station, my said, "i miss jill. i almost starting crying when she left." great. that's probably more than she will do for me. haha.
but for real. my mind is not cooperating with me. it is aware that it is leaving for a year, that it won't see anyone it knows for twelve months, that it will only encounter short people with curly hair, furry feet and speak with strange accents, and it will be driving on the utterly wrong side of the road. it knows all this, but it does not understand it. it has thought about this possibility for almost 8 years, but was never entirely sure it would ever become a reality. my mind sometimes cannot handle it. however, my heart is freaking out. anytime it hears the words "new zealand", "plane", "travel" or "jemaine" it pumps even faster, as if it is trying to get the rest of my body as excited as it is. especially my brain. my mind is slowly getting there, but it needs to keep the heart grounded and stable. the idea of finally achieving this is so surreal. when i my plane lands on new zealand soil, i don't know how i will react, and i hope i don't scare the person sitting next to me.
i will write again on Friday night. i am sure i won't be able to sleep. especially with a long flight ahead of me. some of you might not know this, but i am not the best flier in the world. if you know sean reimer, ask him about it. he experienced my nerves first hand. on almost a dozen flights.
alright, i'm outie (i just watched clueless. may i say . . . brilliant?!),
jewels
please, pray for me and my family. see-laters are not the greatest thing to say.
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3 comments:
Hey, yeah I get what you mean. It hit me like 2 hours before I went to the airport that was really leaving. But don't sweat it. The hardest part is leaving. Once you arrive, it's mostly cake from there. For the plane, I would recommend NyQuil. It knocks you out like the whole flight.
I believe in you.
sad face = me.
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